By Sensei Serge Sognonvi and Carmen Sognonvi
Originally published at http://www.urbandojo.com/blog

It’s the beginning of a new month, and that means it’s time for a new Powerful Word!

Throughout June 2011, we’ll be working on the concept of “integrity.”

All our discussions and activities will aim to help our students understand what it means to be true to oneself, one’s values and principles, one’s word, and one’s standards and beliefs.

Powerful Words is the name of our character development curriculum here at Urban Martial Arts. It’s designed by one of the nation’s leading childhood development experts, Dr. Robyn Silverman. Every month, we’ll focus on a different Powerful Word, or concept around character development.

Here’s a video from Dr. Robyn Silverman in which she introduces some of the concepts we’ll be covering this month:

Many people mistakenly equate integrity with simply being honest. But integrity is so much more than that. Integrity is about being true to oneself, one’s values and principles, one’s word, and one’s standards and beliefs. It’s raw honesty in the deepest regard to oneself and others.

All our character traits must stand on a foundation of integrity. In fact, character and integrity are inextricably linked. Character reflects one’s set of values. Integrity is the grit to uphold them. They must work together to have meaning. After all, what good is gratitude when we are not really grateful? What good is concern when the concern is falsified? We want our children to build genuine character- that takes integrity.

Creating a strong foundation of integrity has big advantages as your child grows up to become part of the work force. According to several studies, integrity, along with honesty and humility can predict superior job performance. It’s so important that it’s been argued this year that such traits predict better job performance even more so than agreeableness and conscientiousness (Journal of Personality and Individual Differences, March 2011). Read the full article →

By Sensei Serge Sognonvi and Carmen Sognonvi
Originally published at http://www.urbandojo.com/blog

Throughout May 2011, we’ll be working on the concept of “optimism” as part of our Powerful Words character development curriculum.

All our discussions and activities will aim to help our students understand how to look at the bright side — how to see a challenge and know everything is going to turn out exactly as it should.

In this video, Dr. Robyn gives advice to parent who would like to help her child be more optimistic:

Dr. Robyn believes that there’s such a thing as learned optimism. In other words, it’s your choice whether to be optimistic or pessimistic.

Here are 5 tips from Dr. Robyn if you’d like your child to become more optimistic:

1. Reword negative statements

The next time your child says something like “I can’t…” or “I stink at…”, ask them to pause and think about what they’re really feeling in the moment. Then ask them to reword the statement to reflect that. For example, “Right now I’m embarrassed that I’m failing” or “Right now I feel afraid that people will laugh at me.” Once you zero in on what they’re actually feeling, you can address it with a solution.

2. Help them understand the power of thoughts

Teach your child that thoughts have the power to influence our mindset, and through that, our actions. Help them recognize what thoughts they’re saying to themselves in their head. Are they positive thoughts or negative thoughts? And why? Read the full article →

By Sensei Serge Sognonvi and Carmen Sognonvi
Originally published at http://www.urbandojo.com/blog

Throughout May 2011, we’ll be working on the concept of “optimism” as part of our Powerful Words character development curriculum.

All our discussions and activities will aim to help our students understand how to look at the bright side — how to see a challenge and know everything is going to turn out exactly as it should.

This month’s “Dear Dr. Robyn” column is all about teaching our children how to be optimismic.

Dr. Robyn Silverman is the child development expert who created Powerful Words, our character development curriculum here at Urban Martial Arts.

Dear Dr. Robyn,

One of our children is a “glass half full” kind of a person– always looking on the sunny side of every situation. But our other child, unfortunately, always seems to have a rain cloud over his head– he’s just so negative! How can I help him to see things more positively?
—Gideon & Ruth G, London UK

Dear Gideon & Ruth,

As we know from years of research, optimism has enormous benefits for attitude and health. Fortunately, optimism can be taught and instilled in children.

Here are some tips you can start using right away:

1. Help them remember that failure is temporary:
When a project or activity goes wrong, help your children stay clear of absolutes like “I never get things right” or “This always happens.” Validate their feelings and help them to decipher what went wrong but also remind them that they’ve had many successes in their lives and they will have many more.

2. Nix the labels
Stay clear of labeling your children “our negative child” or things of that nature. Labels can leave a child boxed in and can interfere with their self concept. Especially when labels carry a negative
connotation, they can inadvertently encourage the behavior you are trying to extinguish. Children tend to live up to the expectations we set- so be careful not to create a self-fulfilling prophesy! Read the full article →